When you think you’ve found your Soulmate, but you still parted ways, what do you do?

When you think you’ve found your soulmate, but you still parted ways, what do you do? 

It’s 4 in the morning and I cant sleep. Guess Im back to doing my therapeutic writing. 

So I met an amazing man last year. We met in Bataan, on a beach. Just when I thought I wouldn’t fall inlove anymore. I did. I fell inlove with this kind-hearted, smart, weird, simple, family loving man. I love him, his quirks and flaws. I embraced every quality this man has to offer. We can talk for 3 hours straight and we still wouldn’t be bored with each other. He was everything I prayed for. Responsible, family-oriented, with no alcohol or smoking vices, and most importantly, He loves Jesus like me. We have the same values. He was also a Christian like me. Its funny, he also liked everything I liked. We have so much similarities: his love for the beach and ocean, for God and for family. Him being thrifty like I do. Both of us sharing bible verses and talking about faith everyday. Anything under the sun. Really. It was like I found my soulmate. My destiny.

 I mostly only have happy memories of him. 

However, we still parted ways. We broke up. He broke up with me. The reason? That I wouldn’t disclose in my blog because I still love and respect him dearly despite everything. I was deeply hurt, but I was not angry at him. I trusted God’s plan for the both of us. I realized that maybe it was God who moved in his heart to make that decision, to change us both for the better, although it was painful and sudden. I learned to accept it with God’s grace, but I do not deny the fact that i still get sad as I miss this person from time to time. Maybe we have different journeys to take. I honestly do not know. 

But if there is anything I would take from this relationship is this: FOLLOW JESUS completely. You have to make God the center of your relationship to make it work. It just wouldn’t work without the Lord. It’s not enough to love Jesus, you have to FOLLOW Him. Maybe the parting saved as both. Idk really. 

I am not closing my heart. Love is a beautiful thing after all. If im going to take something from this experience is this: No matter what a person has done to hurt me, I will always choose to love because we are all imperfect human beings. I will always choose to love, may it be in a romantic or non-romantic sense. 

2018 taught me to always choose to love. “We will always see imperfections towards everyone, but if we focus our eyes on God, who is perfect and holy, we will always see each other with mercy, care and love.” I’ve heard this from a local CCF Pastor I attend sunday service at. 

When we truly learn that God is both sovereign and good, we can open our hands, without resentment, to the future of his choosing rather than our own. 

Do not idolize a relationship or a man. Security is found only in Jesus Christ. A partner is a blessing and a bonus, yes. But complete happiness & satisfaction can only be filled by God and God alone. 

Even though some people disappointed, failed and left me this year, I still chose to love these people despite their imperfections, because that is what God wants me to do, no matter how hard it is. Why? Because walking with Jesus Christ means practicing love, forgiveness, humility and respect despite the situation and people not being in your favor. Know that choosing to be in His path will one day reward you eternally beside Him that no amount of temporal earthly things can fill.

As I grow older, I realized that love is a commitment directed to loving imperfect ppl which often requires sacrifice to seek their highest capacity/good. To love others is to admit u cannot love people perfectly. We have to seek Jesus and humility continually.

But at the end of it all, love always outlives and prevails.

I recently saw this former partner in Bali last December when I was travelling. I was caught off guard. Of all places, I saw him out of the country. 

To see his smile brought joy to my heart, but it also gave me an ache as I realized I missed him, all the while as he held my right hand out of surprise. He was beaming like he’s usual self. His smile made me happy inside already. My hopeless romantic heart would tell me “its destiny” but my realistic adult self now would tell me “it might be a coincidence, who knows”. 

I still believe in destiny, but I came to realize that its still up to our “choices” of what to make of those ‘encountered chances’. 

One more thing i could add is this:

“If its for you, then its for you. No circumstance, challenges could hinder you from you destiny. May it be in love or career. What you have to do is love yourself, work hard on making yourself better everyday, and trust God’s grace. Everything will eventually fall into place, if its God’s will for you. Just do your very best.....(like what I did now, I wrote about it and poured my heart into it)” 

I hope this post has blessed you in some way, if someone is even reading this. 

I end this blog with the same question on the subject... “When you think you’ve found your soulmate, but you still parted ways, what do you do?”

I guess you do nothing and surrender it to the Lord....as long as you’ve tried your best to fight and salvage the relationship with this person, then you’ve done the best way you can. That is what I did. I tried my very best. But at the end, I realize I cannot force love on anyone. I cannot force relationship, or commitment, or my dreams or passion into other people. I cannot force anyone. I tried my best to work it out with him. However, it has to be two people fighting for a relationship to work. Not just one. If you have no control of the situation anymore, learn to trust God instead. An aspect of a fully surrendered life is trust. Sometimes the best thing you could do if you cant control things is to surrender and to trust the One Above. Continue to have faith and to love. Do not let anger, bitterness or hate fill your heart. Take the higher ground. If he really is your soulmate, God will give Him back to you. Nothing will hinder it from happening. If he’s not, then have faith that He will only give you nothing but the best one day and it will all makes sense when the time comes. 

Surrender, Trust and Love. 

❤️1 Peter 5:10❤️

 "After you have suffered for a little while, the God of grace who calls to share his eternal glory in union w Christ will himself perfect u and give u firmness, strength and foundation".

❤️Romans 8:18❤️

  "for the pain youve been feeling right now cant compare to the Joy thats coming" 

Proverbs 3:5-6 

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight."

“Now however, these 3 remain: Faith, Hope and Love, but the greatest of these is Love 

~ 1 Corinthians 13:13